On Responsibility and Consequences

I agree that we should take responsibility for all our actions. Only a coward would run away from owning up to the consequences of his/her responsibility. And I also agree that a person is not just responsible for his/herself but also to the people close to him/her like taking care of sick parents, supporting your sibling's education, helping a friend in need, etc. Basically, being responsible means doing the RIGHT thing. Let's say if we find a wallet full of money on the street, it is our responsibility to find its rightful owner and return it. Or if we see a hungry kitten on the street it's our responsibility to feed it.

But should we take responsibility for something that we know is NOT right? Especially taking responsibility for somebody who doesn't feel the need to be responsible for himself and people close to him? Who doesn't know what the word "responsibility" means even when one gives him the dictionary to look it up? For me that is not being responsible; it's being exploited. I believe that you should only be responsible for what you believe is the right thing to do. If you know that something is wrong, then you shouldn't be suckered into being responsible for it and ultimately pay for the consequences.

Somebody I know used to say that life is about making choices and she chooses to be a responsible person. It's a noble choice and I wish more people are like her because being a responsible person takes a lot of guts. But there is a fine line that divides between responsibility as a virtuous pursuit and responsibility as an irrational human behavior.

Going back to my experience volunteering at the abused women shelter in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, one of the main reasons these women stay in the abusive relationship for a long time before they finally decide to leave is because they feel responsible for their abusive spouses/partners and to keep the marriage intact no matter how bad it is. It takes them a long time to figure out that it's such a shitty responsibility to have before they finally decide to escape.

My point is that you cannot be responsible for something you know deep down inside is wrong. It's not called responsibility; it's a complete and abject surrender of free will. You should only assume responsibility and the consequences from doing something you truly believe in and one you believe is RIGHT.

It reminds me of the old P. Ramlee film "Anakku Sazali." Sazali in the film is a rich spoiled brat who always gets whatever he wants and his dad never once stands up to him. Sazali grows up to be a ruthless gangster and one day after a botched robbery he tries to hide from the police in his dad's house. His dad is now faced with a dilemma: should he turn over his only son to the police or hide him? His dad always gives in to all Sazali's demands since he was small and so Sazali is confident that he'd protect him now. In the end, the dad does the right thing by calling the police to come to the house and arrest Sazali. It takes the dad so many years to realize that he has been responsible for his son for all the wrong reasons and finally decides to atone for his past sins by getting Sazali arrested. It's one of my all time favorite P. Ramlee's films.